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How to deal with Dementia

1822 Views 18 Replies 10 Participants Last post by  phalanx
I am dealing with a prob I have never had before. My Dad, 79 yrs old, is not the same person he was last year. He and my Mom, 85, live in Kanada.
The last few months, he has become someone I don't know. He is paranoid of the littlest of things, and it manifest's into major scenarios for him. They live in my house up there, altho I live in the USA. 3.5 hr drive for me to go up there. His grasp on reality has deteriated that it scares myself, and my Mom. He as told me of thoughts of suicide, and then jokes about them. He is on anti-depressants, and on his latest visit with the doctor, he told me he didn't tell her about his thoughts. Hence she did not realize that what she has prescribed are not working. I now must head back up there and attempt to talk to his doctor personally, and hope for some other form of medical help.
He does not have the full symtoms of Dementia, but some are there; as well as paranoia. They live in a house I own, but he feels it is contaminated with black mould, and that is why my Mom has difficulty breathing. *hello* I have told him that when you get older in age, as Mom is; that your body is not as efficent as it was years ago. But to no avail. He makes any tiny molehill into an impassable mountain.
Mom at this point seems more sane than he is, and is working with me to get him help.
Anyone out there having dealt with this, have any suggestions?
As I will be in Kanada, I might be outta touch for a few days, unless I can latch onto a wireless connection.
A friend has suggested that he just wants me to be there, so portraying these symtoms is just to get me there. But, I have a job/life here, and can only go up when it permits.
Sorry to vent, but I consider you peeps as knowledgeable in almost everything, so any ideas and support is welcome. :eek:

Tks in advance peeps.
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i've had to deal with this too. but in a great grandmother, a grandfather... now my girlfriends grandmother. it is hard to watch the decline. the intermittent moments of ok then lapses into the past.

we had to remove the firing pins out of my great grandmothers guns. we couldn't take them from her because they were hers and for her protection. but she thought that people were invading the house to steal all of her quilts. granted there were a lot of them literally a room stacked to the ceiling with only walk ways. that and the plethora of complete collections of depression glass that she had spent the previous 20 years collecting.

there is a lot of AL in other things that people use every day. antiperspirant being one of them. generally the first ingredient. i have not used it for the better art of the past 10 years because of this. watching my great grandmother deteriorate was too much for me. losing my mind is one of my greatest fears.

whoa rugman what the hell were you feed that would do that?

al in deodorant: you would be surprised how fast your body adjusts to you not using it. if i have been in our warehouse for 8 hours i stink, but so does anyone else. your body does not need it. normal day to day stuff, i do not stink like you expect someone to who does not wear the stuff. i try not to drink out of cans even.

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