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New element discovered!

1374 Views 8 Replies 7 Participants Last post by  Ouchman
A new element discovered

Recent hurricanes and climatic issues are proof of the existence of a new chemical element. Research has led to the discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science.

The new element, Governmentium (Gv), has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons & 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons. Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A minute amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction (that would normally take less than a second) to be delayed any time from four days to fourteen years.

Governmentium has a normal half-life of two to six years; it does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which some of the assistant neutrons & deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.

This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass.

When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium, since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.
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joker ,in the past Governmintium has been seen ,but was hard to detect.
At that time Scientist knew it was there ,but didn't have the ability to catch it in the act of gaining in mass or becoming critical morass.
The once super charged particles called medialiea ,emitted so much BS radiation that the crude instruments of the past couldn't detect Governmintium.
Governmintium when it reaches critical mass can become so unstable that it can collapse under its own mass ,forming massive black holes sucking all the matter around it into the hole.
This was seen twice in the 20 century in Russia and Germany ,where even people seemed to just vanish.
Hollygaywoodtium is a BY product of Governmintium . It is a suspected player in this also ,but it tends to not seek out other charged particles, and stays with its own type giving it more and more ability to screw up the natural order of things and it is worthless ,And it is surrounded by medialiea radiation.
There is only one thing to do in cases like this ,Governmintium and all the problems and dangerous radiation the above creates ,needs to all be encased in lead ,and buried forever in the Deserts of Utah.
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